Random Story Time
Feb 11, 2025 at 4:16pm
I once went to McDonalds, waaay back when $5 was expensive, and bought food that totaled something like $6.85.
I gave the cashier a five, two ones, and a dime.
She looked at me funny, then went to the register and I assume punched the usual register buttons, then gave me back my dime and another dime and a nickel.
I had to ask if I could get that changed for a quarter.
Poor girl looked like she was questioning reality at that moment.
But I did get the quarter! Yay!
I gave the cashier a five, two ones, and a dime.
She looked at me funny, then went to the register and I assume punched the usual register buttons, then gave me back my dime and another dime and a nickel.
I had to ask if I could get that changed for a quarter.
Poor girl looked like she was questioning reality at that moment.
But I did get the quarter! Yay!
Feb 12, 2025 at 9:49am
Mental arithmetic is now sadly seems to be a much neglected topic. Way, way, way back when at junior school we used to have daily mental arithmetic. At secondary the maths lessons all started with some mental arithmetic.
Feb 12, 2025 at 1:28pm
It seemed like she didn't know that some change is more preferable than others
Feb 12, 2025 at 11:31pm
It is a skill that must be taught, just like any other.
STORY 2 • Moo Cows Are Not What You Think
When I was young my mother and three sisters and I took a trip to visit my aunt and cousins in Lethbridge, AB, on their farm.
Besides growing crops of food, they also had quite a few dairy cattle, and even the ability to process (pasturize + homogenize) some milk for their own use.
My sisters had a lot of fun feeding the calves through the fence. I preferred to explore the barn. Got to help hook up a few cows to the milk machines, even. Aaannnd I got to see a cow get artificially inseminated. There’s an interesting job for you.
At one point something happened (I don’t even remember what) so that all the cows headed off somewhere they shouldn’t have gotten to and everyone went running off after them: My aunt and cousins because they knew what they were doing and my mom and sisters because we were tourists. (Well, my mother because my aunt asked her to help.)
I had no desire to chase after a bunch of cows. But after a few minutes of being left alone and supposedly missing actual adventure, I went to follow after.
Wandering out over the mud in my brand-spanking-new sneakers, which my mother had just bought for me the week prior in preparation for this very trip — I got the idea that perhaps I shouldn’t be out in the mud in my brand new sneakers when, just like in a cartoon, my feet went plop!, plop! down into the mud, about four inches deep.
It was also at that very moment that it occurred to me that I wasn’t standing on mud.
O_o
Quicksand-like, poo is. Never could get it all off.
Mom wasn’t too pleased at that. My mother is awesome, though, and understood that things happen, and didn’t give me any real grief about it. For the rest of the trip I wore an old pair of work/cowboy boots belonging to I think one of my cousins.
Lesson: Don’t wear nice shoes into a cow paddy.
Now, cows can be friendly, and while technically domesticated, they really are wild animals. Unless you spend a whole lot of time with individual cows they don’t really see humans as much more than obnoxious jerks with food.
While there a neighbor and her teenage daughter came by with a couple of her horses so that we could ride. Which was pretty cool!
So imagine eleven-year-old me trotting along next to her, enjoying my first time on a horse and talking to a pretty girl also on a horse (very extra cool!), when our horses both come to a sudden stop.
We look up and see that some fifty to a hundred cows are staring back at us, in a near half-circle around us. It felt like I had just stepped into the O.K. Corral, and I was not one of the gunfighters. One of the cows in front, looking especially ornery, huffed out her nose.
And then we were just hanging on for dear life as those cows chased those two horses into the very large front yard and down the very long driveway toward the fence at the road. I didn’t know what would happen when we reached the fence, and I could see the girl I was with wide-eyed and probably wondering the same thing. I knew I wouldn’t be able to hang on if that horse tried to jump that fence. I honestly don’t think the horse thought it could jump the fence.
Fortunately everything stopped about ten feet before the fence. I guess the cows made their point, because they blinked and turned and calmly walked back to their domain.
Lesson: Don’t mess with cows.
My father flew out to drive home with us. On the way back we stopped to get some whole milk and cereal for breakfast.
Blegh.
We ate sandwiches instead.
Lesson: After sampling ambrosia you must wait a while before eating normal gruel again. (What we call “whole milk” is only about 3.5 percent milk fat, which simply does not compare to milk straight from the cow.)
STORY 2 • Moo Cows Are Not What You Think
When I was young my mother and three sisters and I took a trip to visit my aunt and cousins in Lethbridge, AB, on their farm.
Besides growing crops of food, they also had quite a few dairy cattle, and even the ability to process (pasturize + homogenize) some milk for their own use.
My sisters had a lot of fun feeding the calves through the fence. I preferred to explore the barn. Got to help hook up a few cows to the milk machines, even. Aaannnd I got to see a cow get artificially inseminated. There’s an interesting job for you.
At one point something happened (I don’t even remember what) so that all the cows headed off somewhere they shouldn’t have gotten to and everyone went running off after them: My aunt and cousins because they knew what they were doing and my mom and sisters because we were tourists. (Well, my mother because my aunt asked her to help.)
I had no desire to chase after a bunch of cows. But after a few minutes of being left alone and supposedly missing actual adventure, I went to follow after.
Wandering out over the mud in my brand-spanking-new sneakers, which my mother had just bought for me the week prior in preparation for this very trip — I got the idea that perhaps I shouldn’t be out in the mud in my brand new sneakers when, just like in a cartoon, my feet went plop!, plop! down into the mud, about four inches deep.
It was also at that very moment that it occurred to me that I wasn’t standing on mud.
O_o
Quicksand-like, poo is. Never could get it all off.
Mom wasn’t too pleased at that. My mother is awesome, though, and understood that things happen, and didn’t give me any real grief about it. For the rest of the trip I wore an old pair of work/cowboy boots belonging to I think one of my cousins.
Lesson: Don’t wear nice shoes into a cow paddy.
Now, cows can be friendly, and while technically domesticated, they really are wild animals. Unless you spend a whole lot of time with individual cows they don’t really see humans as much more than obnoxious jerks with food.
While there a neighbor and her teenage daughter came by with a couple of her horses so that we could ride. Which was pretty cool!
So imagine eleven-year-old me trotting along next to her, enjoying my first time on a horse and talking to a pretty girl also on a horse (very extra cool!), when our horses both come to a sudden stop.
We look up and see that some fifty to a hundred cows are staring back at us, in a near half-circle around us. It felt like I had just stepped into the O.K. Corral, and I was not one of the gunfighters. One of the cows in front, looking especially ornery, huffed out her nose.
And then we were just hanging on for dear life as those cows chased those two horses into the very large front yard and down the very long driveway toward the fence at the road. I didn’t know what would happen when we reached the fence, and I could see the girl I was with wide-eyed and probably wondering the same thing. I knew I wouldn’t be able to hang on if that horse tried to jump that fence. I honestly don’t think the horse thought it could jump the fence.
Fortunately everything stopped about ten feet before the fence. I guess the cows made their point, because they blinked and turned and calmly walked back to their domain.
Lesson: Don’t mess with cows.
My father flew out to drive home with us. On the way back we stopped to get some whole milk and cereal for breakfast.
Blegh.
We ate sandwiches instead.
Lesson: After sampling ambrosia you must wait a while before eating normal gruel again. (What we call “whole milk” is only about 3.5 percent milk fat, which simply does not compare to milk straight from the cow.)
Feb 14, 2025 at 11:03pm
Should've gotten a cheeseburger instead and gotten some revenge by proxy on those jerks.
I always optimize so that the cashier and I trade about the same number of bills/coins. Speaking of which, the one good thing I have to say about living with ~100% annual inflation for so many years is that coins are essentially phased out. All cash is notes now.
I always optimize so that the cashier and I trade about the same number of bills/coins. Speaking of which, the one good thing I have to say about living with ~100% annual inflation for so many years is that coins are essentially phased out. All cash is notes now.
Feb 15, 2025 at 12:20am
On a flight recently, the stewardess asked: "Did I wanted tea or coffee? "
I replied: "Yes please, white coffee no sugar."
She said: "Do you want milk and sugar with that?"
I said: "Just the milk, thanks."
She gave me 2 milks, and 2 sugars.
I guess it's so boring, they need it to be real simple.
I replied: "Yes please, white coffee no sugar."
She said: "Do you want milk and sugar with that?"
I said: "Just the milk, thanks."
She gave me 2 milks, and 2 sugars.
I guess it's so boring, they need it to be real simple.
Feb 15, 2025 at 1:49am| TheIdeasMan wrote: |
|---|
| I guess it's so boring, they need it to be real simple. |
Maybe. I’ve learned that flight attendants, whenever they seem distracted, are probably dealing with something on the flight that you don’t want to know about.
Last edited on Feb 15, 2025 at 1:49am
Feb 15, 2025 at 6:09pm
I grew up around cows -- our 'neighbor' (his actual home was about 2 miles away) owned a LOT of the land around us and put a minimal number of cows on about 3/4 of it to make it qualify as 'farmland' which has a much, much lighter tax per acre. So imagine having woods on one side and 20ish cows on the other 3, kind of like that; our family lot was 4 acres.
They can be sweet, or stubborn, and when frightened or aggravated, dangerous. After my childhood curiosity wore off, I largely avoided them unless compelled to interact. The fences were ... cheap and old, so a few would get out every year and someone always had to get it to stop wrecking the yard (simply walking across the yard can do significant damage with that much weight, and if it runs, its like a post hole digger gone mad). Getting one to go back where it belongs is an art form; they want to explore. They are not adverse to going back, but every 10 feet there is a distraction and something exciting to look at, kinda like a toddler. I rescued countless of the younglings who had just grown stubby little horns and fishhooked their heads on the wire fence trying to find better tasting grass on the other side. Mostly, you just need to approach them such that they can see you clearly and that you are not attacking or acting weird. Then you can touch them if needed. But you don't need to get that close usually, they are quite happy to respond to gestures and verbal commands that eventually get the message across to 'come here' or 'go in there'.
Did I mention they can be dangerous? The things weigh some 800-1000 pounds and do not understand that stepping on you, bumping into you etc is a lot of force. They do understand that when they want to hurt you, instinct and being wired to trample you are all part of their defenses (and in some cases, esp bulls, offenses) but they don't realize the damage they can do by accident. One of them was involved in my father in law's death a few years back.. picture old mcdonald at 90+, the man did the 1920s lifestyle growing his own food etc (he just loved this lifestyle that reminded him of his own childhood) and either he messed up and the cow panicked/attacked/something and hit him causing a heart attack or he had a heart attack first and then the cow panicked, its not clear what happened first. Between being stepped on and heart attacked and rather old, he didn't make it :(
They can be sweet, or stubborn, and when frightened or aggravated, dangerous. After my childhood curiosity wore off, I largely avoided them unless compelled to interact. The fences were ... cheap and old, so a few would get out every year and someone always had to get it to stop wrecking the yard (simply walking across the yard can do significant damage with that much weight, and if it runs, its like a post hole digger gone mad). Getting one to go back where it belongs is an art form; they want to explore. They are not adverse to going back, but every 10 feet there is a distraction and something exciting to look at, kinda like a toddler. I rescued countless of the younglings who had just grown stubby little horns and fishhooked their heads on the wire fence trying to find better tasting grass on the other side. Mostly, you just need to approach them such that they can see you clearly and that you are not attacking or acting weird. Then you can touch them if needed. But you don't need to get that close usually, they are quite happy to respond to gestures and verbal commands that eventually get the message across to 'come here' or 'go in there'.
Did I mention they can be dangerous? The things weigh some 800-1000 pounds and do not understand that stepping on you, bumping into you etc is a lot of force. They do understand that when they want to hurt you, instinct and being wired to trample you are all part of their defenses (and in some cases, esp bulls, offenses) but they don't realize the damage they can do by accident. One of them was involved in my father in law's death a few years back.. picture old mcdonald at 90+, the man did the 1920s lifestyle growing his own food etc (he just loved this lifestyle that reminded him of his own childhood) and either he messed up and the cow panicked/attacked/something and hit him causing a heart attack or he had a heart attack first and then the cow panicked, its not clear what happened first. Between being stepped on and heart attacked and rather old, he didn't make it :(
Feb 19, 2025 at 4:04am
When using Wifi, I sometimes see Networks such as: "Your Cat Shits In Our Yard" ; "Don't Click it" ; and "Really Don't Click It". :+D
Mar 10, 2025 at 1:45am
Okay, next story.
I WISH I could remember specifics. It was such a random, one-off interaction some years ago. I wish I had the foresight to write it down then, while my memory was fresh, but at the time I just dismissed it as “too weird to share”.
I was at a travel stop of some sort. I’m pretty sure it was a Love’s. Alas I do not recall even where in the USA I was at the time.
The men’s room was a very large one: the layout was much larger than the usual urinals along one wall and toilet stalls opposite, arrayed perpendicular to the sinks setup.
In this case, there were maybe twenty urinals total, wrapping along two walls of the room. I am also pretty sure that it was only myself and one other guy in the room, with maybe one person exiting.
We had entered at near enough the same time that I do not recall any different, but I had approached a urinal to my left and he had walked across the room to a urinal along the other wall. Either that or he was waffling at one and I went to the opposite wall. (All men know this is standard urinal etiquette.)
I began to take care of my business, and the other guy said, kind of loudly, something along the lines of:
“Man! How do you keep from peeing until you’re ready?”
(All men and plenty of women also know that getting it in the urinal is something a distressing number of men seem to struggle with. —But the ability to aim is not the point of this tale.)
Trying not to laugh, I answered him.
“Just give it a little squeeze.”
His response was instant.
“What do you mean?”
I had no idea how he was confused on this point, but finding this exchange increasingly amusing, I answered again.
“Just... give it a little pinch, you know, like a straw, pinch it in the middle until you are ready to let it go.”
This was, evidently, something beyond his sense of reckoning. He could barely string two coherent words together for a good two or three seconds.
“What? You can’t? How can you...? That’s not right!...”
I think I managed not to laugh out loud, but I did have to conclude, “It doesn’t hurt and does no damage. And it works.”
But he was insensate at this point.
“I can’t believe you’re serious! I... I can’t do that!”
I left to wash up after that, not knowing what else to say. (It is possible I wished him a good evening or something, but again, time has robbed me of all but the absurdity of the event itself.)
My wife says this is totally TMI, but... I proffer it here for you all to laugh at. Or boggle at. (To be fair, I don’t think most boys were taught how to do things like, well, aim.)
I WISH I could remember specifics. It was such a random, one-off interaction some years ago. I wish I had the foresight to write it down then, while my memory was fresh, but at the time I just dismissed it as “too weird to share”.
I was at a travel stop of some sort. I’m pretty sure it was a Love’s. Alas I do not recall even where in the USA I was at the time.
The men’s room was a very large one: the layout was much larger than the usual urinals along one wall and toilet stalls opposite, arrayed perpendicular to the sinks setup.
In this case, there were maybe twenty urinals total, wrapping along two walls of the room. I am also pretty sure that it was only myself and one other guy in the room, with maybe one person exiting.
We had entered at near enough the same time that I do not recall any different, but I had approached a urinal to my left and he had walked across the room to a urinal along the other wall. Either that or he was waffling at one and I went to the opposite wall. (All men know this is standard urinal etiquette.)
I began to take care of my business, and the other guy said, kind of loudly, something along the lines of:
“Man! How do you keep from peeing until you’re ready?”
(All men and plenty of women also know that getting it in the urinal is something a distressing number of men seem to struggle with. —But the ability to aim is not the point of this tale.)
Trying not to laugh, I answered him.
“Just give it a little squeeze.”
His response was instant.
“What do you mean?”
I had no idea how he was confused on this point, but finding this exchange increasingly amusing, I answered again.
“Just... give it a little pinch, you know, like a straw, pinch it in the middle until you are ready to let it go.”
This was, evidently, something beyond his sense of reckoning. He could barely string two coherent words together for a good two or three seconds.
“What? You can’t? How can you...? That’s not right!...”
I think I managed not to laugh out loud, but I did have to conclude, “It doesn’t hurt and does no damage. And it works.”
But he was insensate at this point.
“I can’t believe you’re serious! I... I can’t do that!”
I left to wash up after that, not knowing what else to say. (It is possible I wished him a good evening or something, but again, time has robbed me of all but the absurdity of the event itself.)
My wife says this is totally TMI, but... I proffer it here for you all to laugh at. Or boggle at. (To be fair, I don’t think most boys were taught how to do things like, well, aim.)
Mar 10, 2025 at 9:44am
I was at a very nice and well known performance center in my city. I've been there twice, once to perform and once to watch a performance. I don't remember which for this occasion.
After the performance was done, people leave the building from the front, but the performers leave from exits on the sides.
I was standing outside one of the side exits (along with many other people waiting for their family/friends that had performed) waiting for someone. A group came out and the door closed behind them.
Another group walks up to the door with a girl at the front. She pushes to open the door, but it doesn't budge.
A man (well over 6ft) nearby on my side of the door goes up to it and tries to open it, concluding it's locked (even though it was just open seconds ago).
The woman inside looks out at us confused and not knowing what to do. The guy pleads with her that it's locked somehow and can't be opened.
I looked at the door and saw there was a keyhole that likely wasn't electronic. There may have been a lock for the shutting mechanism that was accidentally triggered remotely, but I quickly glanced over the front of the building and saw people still leaving normally, so I figured this unluckily event was even less plausible.
I (18 or less at the time) walked up to the door pretty confident it was just stuck, gave it a nice tug and opened it right up.
The man who tried before looked embarrassed and some old ladies looked at me amazed (or amused?) like they've never seen a man before in their life.
After the performance was done, people leave the building from the front, but the performers leave from exits on the sides.
I was standing outside one of the side exits (along with many other people waiting for their family/friends that had performed) waiting for someone. A group came out and the door closed behind them.
Another group walks up to the door with a girl at the front. She pushes to open the door, but it doesn't budge.
A man (well over 6ft) nearby on my side of the door goes up to it and tries to open it, concluding it's locked (even though it was just open seconds ago).
The woman inside looks out at us confused and not knowing what to do. The guy pleads with her that it's locked somehow and can't be opened.
I looked at the door and saw there was a keyhole that likely wasn't electronic. There may have been a lock for the shutting mechanism that was accidentally triggered remotely, but I quickly glanced over the front of the building and saw people still leaving normally, so I figured this unluckily event was even less plausible.
I (18 or less at the time) walked up to the door pretty confident it was just stuck, gave it a nice tug and opened it right up.
The man who tried before looked embarrassed and some old ladies looked at me amazed (or amused?) like they've never seen a man before in their life.
Mar 11, 2025 at 12:47pm
I admit I’ve done that many times. Far from being too weak to do something, I often just didn’t apply that much power to, say, opening a door, and was confused that it didn’t open.
Things don’t always behave the way you expect. Kind of like when you go to lift a jug of milk or something and it is mostly empty and you wind up lifting it up hard and smashing the shelf above it.
I have learned, at least, to try pulling/pushing/manhandling things with a little more effort if my soft touch doesn’t work at first go.
Anyway, weird aside: I was looking through the list of donors to Project 2025, and was struck by one weird thing — by how many underwear manufacturers donated to it. Like, wt--? Underwear?
Things don’t always behave the way you expect. Kind of like when you go to lift a jug of milk or something and it is mostly empty and you wind up lifting it up hard and smashing the shelf above it.
I have learned, at least, to try pulling/pushing/manhandling things with a little more effort if my soft touch doesn’t work at first go.
Anyway, weird aside: I was looking through the list of donors to Project 2025, and was struck by one weird thing — by how many underwear manufacturers donated to it. Like, wt--? Underwear?
Mar 11, 2025 at 2:30pm
If the project is expected to make many soil their pants, then it is good for underwear business?
Mar 11, 2025 at 8:13pm| I admit I’ve done that many times. Far from being too weak to do something, I often just didn’t apply that much power to, say, opening a door, and was confused that it didn’t open. |
I have no doubt the man was strong enough, it was simply amusing at the time. Especially since I remember he did give it a very light pull and immediately stopped when it didn't budge and told them, on the other side, so assuredly that the door was locked.
| I was looking through the list of donors to Project 2025, and was struck by one weird thing — by how many underwear manufacturers donated to it. Like, wt--? Underwear? |
Well, I haven't checked any list of donors myself. However, it could make sense if these companies obtain their materials/labor from the U.S.
The tariffs (isolationist approach) would obliterate their competitors who could offer a similar product from cheaper materials and labor outside the U.S.
Trump supporters love this but also love the free market, go figure.
Just my guess.
Last edited on Mar 11, 2025 at 8:14pm
Mar 13, 2025 at 9:53pm
you never know. There are at least 2, maybe 3 companies the manufacture underwear for various religions (often conservative leaning) and also for carrying (your gun). Not sure what else would make that happen. Do liberals still hate bras?
Mar 14, 2025 at 8:29am
it was a little joke from ancient history. Long ago, there was a made up bit that the rabid feminists were burning their bras... (a few were burned here and there in protests later on, but it was never a widespread movement or anything). It was just a lighthearted poke at that old stereotype since it was in context. You can dig into the history if you want, but there isn't much there.. someone said it, someone believed it, and the rest is history...
Last edited on Mar 14, 2025 at 8:33am
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